Monday, January 29, 2018

Love as Lip Service and the Divide in the UMC

Last night I was scrolling through my social media feed and one of my "friends" (who I have never met, but with whom I am a co-laborer) posted this passage from Romans:

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. (Romans 12:9, NIV)


And it got me thinking, in the UMC, both sides like to affirm their righteousness with regards to the inner-turmoil by publicly saying things like, "I love all my colleagues" and "we are better together;" however, these phrases are little more than lip service.

The truth is that in progressive safe spaces, there is no love lost for traditionalists who are keeping the denomination in the dark ages.

And behind traditionalist closed doors, there is little more than vitriol for progressives who have forsaken their first love for an Oprah-fied version of Christianity.

I once dated a girl who didn't really like me all that much.  She might say that she loved me and daydream about an idyllic future with 3 kids and 2 dogs in the suburbs, but when it came down to it, I was an interchangeable piece to her future puzzle.  It wasn't me that she loved, it was the idea of what she could turn me into.

And this is where we are as a denomination.  We love the idea of a truly United Methodism where (if you lean to the left) everyone is united in self-discovery, living one's personal truth, and living in harmony with nature and neighbor; or where (if you lean right) we are united in self-control, spreading scriptural holiness throughout the land, and orthodox affirmations.  But, we don't love our adversaries (and yes I chose this word on purpose) enough to allow their vision of the future to influence our shape our own.

Rather, in private text messages and while carpooling to conference events, we angrily decry "those people" who are killing our denomination in the safety of our echo chambers.

I ended up breaking up with the girl.  It was a really good decision.  In the freedom of no longer trying to live into her vision for me, I was able to embrace a more authentic, less anxious version of me. 

Neither faction of United Methodists are willing to live into the other side's vision for the church, which has meant that at every opportunity, we flex our muscles to demonstrate that we won't submit to the other's vision for our denomination.  What might happen if we did just break-up? What if these competing visions no longer had to coexist under the same roof?  Would we too have the opportunity to embrace a more authentic, less anxious version of ourselves, both individually and corporately?

I have friends in both camps, and it will be a bummer to miss out on our annual excursions for ice cream and to play shuffle board; but, for the sake of the mission(s), because we seem incapable of loving each other sincerely, it is probably time to break up.

Now, I admit that I could be wrong.  So, by all means please leave comments that are kind and truthful and if there is a way to keep this thing together, we can figure it out together.

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